To begin, learning the pattern of a narcissistic abuse cycle you are put on by a manipulative narcissist is the best way to learn how to deal with a narcissist.
It is all complex as it’s easy to confuse somebody with a mental disorder like narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) simply as a cocky person who only thinks of themselves.
However, this is not the best approach when you are trying to figure out how to deal with a Narcissist.
While this is common narcissistic behaviour, there are plenty of traits that need to be examined by a professional before giving somebody this title.
We all have a little bit of narcissism in us.
How boring would this world be if that was not the case?
With that being said, if you don’t agree… you are most definitely the covert Narcissist.
Helpguide lists the following as symptoms of a narcissistic personality disorder:
- Grandiose sense of self-importance.
- Lives in a fantasy world that supports their delusions of grandeur.
- Needs constant praise and admiration.
- Sense of entitlement.
- Exploits others without guilt or shame.
- Frequently demeans, intimidates, bullies, or belittles others.
I have been dealing with a narcissistic mother for many years, and I have 5 techniques to help deal with your nightmare.
1 Don’t even bother dealing with a Narcissist
- Turn around, run, and don’t look back
- Narcissists are extremely bitter and spiteful, they will use tactics like parental alienation to have you lose everything you love.
- If you don’t have to get involved, simply leave. However, we all know that sometimes it is necessary.
2 Set boundaries without actually telling them
- Example: if you are told to do something at a certain time, either don’t do it or do it on your own time.
- They don’t like working hard for things, so they are likely to quickly get the point, and deal with it
- A Narcissist will not ever do as you say. Even if they agree, they will not actually do it.
- This is healthy for you to cut yourself from the toxic control of a Narcissist.
3 Do not ever show that you are frustrated
- The minute you show that they are getting to you, it is game over
- Especially after inflicting narcissistic injury, a Narcissist loves to see you having a bad time
- Stand your ground, and put on a fake smile. This will kill them inside knowing they can’t get to you and they are not even close to being a part of your daily life.
- Breaking the abusive cycle is the first step to your recovery
4 Sacrifice anything that won’t completely ruin your life
- If you are trying to decide something that is minor, sacrifice it and move on.
- This will not change the Narcissist just because you did something nice.
- Being a part of narcissistic rage in court is not worth it, and it’s best to, “stroke their ego” with a little fuel to keep them calm
5 Continue to show as much empathy as possible
- If you lose your focus, you will become a negative person.
- If children are involved, they will see this and mimic the good parent over the bad parent.
- You build your character, and this will crush your narcissist at your narcissist every time they see you. Don’t let it get to your head, just do it.
There will always be somebody you can clearly spot as the Narcissist at work.
They will always try to be the best at work, give you back-handed compliments, create a narcissistic triangulation of co-workers, try to get you demoted or fired, and even take credit for your work.
Here are ways to deal with a narcissist at work that is doing whatever they can to bring themselves up, and others down.
1 Smile and nod your head
- Sometimes it’s just not worth the battle.
- If it’s not a necessity for you to work together, you should just do the simple gray rock method
2 Don’t join in on any of the negativity
- Bullying is common for a Narcissist, they can suck you in without you even realizing it
- Once you engage in this activity you will be expected to side with them
- If you realize you have hurt somebody’s feelings, make it right with that person right away
- next time you are brought into the bullying, keep a straight face and walk away.
- You only become more like a narcissistic supply and feeding them every time you engage.
3 Don’t give out any personal opinions or ideas
- Taking credit for other people’s work is like breathing for a Narcissist
- You leave room to be taken advantage of and even a smear campaign from other co-workers
4 Expose their weaknesses quietly
- This isn’t for everybody as it can easily backfire. I love this though.
- Every Narcissist has a weakness or skill they lack at a job and will avoid doing it.
- Nudge this person towards this task if somebody calls in sick, watching them avoid it is satisfying.
- I have met a lot of narcissists at work and learning how to outplay a narcissist without the backlash is a good feeling.
5 Avoid engaging in fights/competition
- I learned a long time ago to not engage.
- A Narcissist will sabotage a task before you even begin
- Bosses will always respect the person that shows teamwork and keeps their calm. Supervisors likely have already had a past conflict with a Narcissist, or it’s bound to happen
At last, I know how hard it is parenting with a narcissist who feels the world revolves around them and a co-worker or boss that just wants to come to work to suck away everybody’s happiness.
It is important to show as much empathy as humanly possible, especially when children are around and nasty traits are the only thing they are experiencing.
You can stop a narcissist from ruining your life and learn the secret techniques to deal with them appropriately.
My daughter is the most empathetic, caring, and positive human being.
because I swallowed my pride and my daughter followed my lead.
Protect your mental health during this time, and continue to be consistent. A Narcissist is always up to something, so don’t let your guard down.
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Get back to finally feeling like yourself again now!